Showing posts with label pregnant. Show all posts
Showing posts with label pregnant. Show all posts

Saturday, 9 March 2019

How to plan a Naming Ceremony

We had our baby's Naming Ceremony in our parlour/living room, hubby & i handled the planning. I knew i wanted us to do something small because i wasn't up for the stress of throwing a big party (it's also not my style). The Naming Ceremony is typically done Seven (7) days after delivery but this can vary depending on your culture and church denomination. You may want to discuss with your spouse and parents while pregnant to know what applies in order for you to make the necessary preparations.
We had only 5 days to put things together for ours due to the time baby spent in the NICU (read my TMI Labor & Delivery Story) before we were discharged. My advice is to plan the basics ahead and decide on any vendors then finalize all arrangements after baby is delivered.
We planned for 30 guests (including friends) and used this number to make all our prep. We spoke with our pastor and agreed on having the ceremony by 10:00am. We informed her grandparents, aunties and uncles that were in town and a few friends (we told our friends to come in the evening though).
Things to do:
  • Inform your pastor and agree on a time for the naming ceremony
  • Invite guests
  • Make arrangement for Refreshments (Small chops, food, water and drinks) based on your estimated no. of guests (have extras for people that bring +1s) 
  • Get an outfit for baby (i had gotten a white gown and white shawl before having baby)
  • Get an outfit for yourself (the parents)- i had my tailor make me an outfit when i got back from the hospital and hubby wore a white traditional attire he had. I did my makeup myself.
  • Type out Baby's names and cut out several strips of the names (this will be distributed to guests). You can have someone design and print this for you, i did this myself and i printed it at home.
  • Type Baby's names and the meaning for the pastor to use during the naming of the baby.
  • If you having the ceremony in your Parlour/Living room like we did, it's good to have supplementary power supply (Generator, Inverter, etc.). You can have someone design and print this for you, i did this myself and i printed it at home.
  • Get a photographer or designate someone to take pictures and make videos during the event. 
  • Have your Parlour/Living room cleaned and dusted and you may want to rearrange your furniture to have more space or get extra chairs depending on your no. of guests.
We bought water and drinks and refrigerated them, i got a caterer to make Jollof rice and peppered chicken, she put them into 30 packs with spoons and serviettes and gave us the rest in a big cooler. We also ordered small chops which we served to friends who came in the evening with drinks.
The naming ceremony started around 10:00am and we were done by 12:00pm. 
The programme went as follows:
  • Opening Prayer
  • Praise and Worship
  • Sermon
  • Naming of the Baby
  • Praying for the Baby
  • Praise & Collection of Offering (the money was given to us to keep for baby)
  • Closing Prayer
We took pictures afterwards, food and drinks were distributed to guests and we exchanged pleasantries before guests took their leave. Only the grandparents and family stayed till evening before leaving.
Baby slept throughout the naming ceremony, i got some sleep afterwards as well. We tidied the house and took out the trash before our friends arrived in the evening. Some of them got packs of rice while others had small chops and drinks for refreshment.
The house was rearranged and tidied when everyone had left in the evening, we refrigerated leftover refreshments, took out the trash and went back to our regular routine.
Some cultures and churches do baby's naming & dedication and baptism after 3 months so find out what applies to you so you are not caught unawares. You can always tweak my recommendations in this post to plan your specific 'baby event' regardless of the date it will be held.
I'll do a post on how we collated all baby's names, if you are yoruba you know the deal, everyone wants to give baby a name. lol
Toodles!XooX

Friday, 30 November 2018

My TMI Labour & Delivery Story (in Abuja, Nigeria)

I had always tried to imagine what my labour and delivery experience would be like, having watched and read the experiences of others on Blogs, BabyCenter and YouTube, to no avail.
When anyone i know personally gives birth, that's what i'm most curious about 'how was the experience of bringing a child into the world?' Most times the response is pretty vague.
This is my labour and delivery story, i can't say Baby Kiara came the way i had imagined, i mean she came on my birthday, a whole week before her due date. I still cherish every moment of it though and thank God for blessing me with her.
My Labor started on Thursday night  (Dec 21st), i could barely get any sleep because i was in pain and could not find a comfortable position, it eventually subsided in the early hours of Friday Morning and i was able to get some sleep. It started again around midday on Friday (Dec 22nd)  and continued randomly but i was extremely active setting up the house & baby things so i thought it was Braxton Hicks. It got more intense towards the evening that i had to take breaks, squat and walk around to relieve the pain (i was contracting already unknown to me).
I decided to go the hospital to get checked around 8:00pm, i had missed my 38week appointment anyway so this checkup would serve as that. I saw the Doctor, he checked me then told me the baby's head was down, heart rate was fine, my BP was OK and i WAS having Contractions though they were currently irregular. I honestly could not believe it!! My due date wasn't for another week and almost everyone had told me she my come even later than her due date 'cos it was my first baby. I was not ready for this news walahi, anyways i digress. I went for an ultrasound scan,they said baby was measuring small for how far gone i was and asked if i was sure i was 39weeks (My info was clearly on the screen by the way)πŸ˜’ I just ignored them, abi how will i not know how long i have been pregnant lugging my protruding belly around and all the symptoms and what was i supposed to do with this info at 39weeks??!! (I will expatiate on this jist in my Pregnancy Diaries).
I took the ultrasound scan results to the Doctor, he told me to ignore them & not worry that baby's size was fine and the main thing was that the vitals were all good. He told me i could be admitted immediately or come back if my contraction got regular or more painful. I decided to go home to tidy up things for baby's arrival, pack baby & I's  hospital bag πŸ™ˆ (i had procrastinated on this 'cos i thought baby would come on her due date or in 2018, as she & I had discussed o) and wait till my contractions were Regular.
INTERLUDE (Small Jist)- While the doctor was checking me with the sonogram, i had a contraction and he was able to time it and determine my contractions were irregular, na so the matron enter the Doctor's office o and overheard what he was telling me. She said i had to be admitted immediately and she would escort me to the Labour & Delivery ward. See me see something o! πŸ˜’Eskiss ma, i'm not going anywhere, i know you are doing your job o, but my doctor said i can go home and that's where i'm headed. She said ok o, she has advised me as its my first time 'cos i may not make it back in time to the hospital for the delivery. Hian! when no be curse, abeg madam u cannot scare me, i dey go my house. I picked my bag and left. as i was leaving i had another contraction but kept a straight face 'cos i was scared they'd force me to be admitted.πŸ˜…
Honestly i just wanted to be in my comfort zone (Home) while in labor and i did not want any unnecessary 'finger/hand in vagina' dilation checks as i have heard they are really painful.
BACK TO THE MAIN STORY
I got home and informed my fam that baby may get here sooner than expected, packed our hospital bags with my sis and last minute house tidying. I finally agreed to rest when the House was clean & rearranged to my satisfaction. I ate and watched TV.  I went into ACTIVE LABOR (it was a totally different level of pain!!) around 11:45pm just as hubby was giving me my birthday gift. It went on till around 5:00am. I stayed in the room alone with the AC on & lights off and was writhing in pain, hubby was in the room initially but started snoring and after i woke him up a couple of times he gladly excused himself to the parlour (The snore was as if something was sparking in my brain and not in a good way) I honestly felt 0 remorse, i swiftly moved all the pillows and throw-pillows to the centre of the bed and tried to find a comfortable position that i'd feel the pain less. I almost started panicking 'cos i had not finished reading up on coping techniques for labor pain and signs to know how i was progressing, i was literally clueless on this side of things. I tried turning on my laptop to watch the videos i had saved but i could barely look at the screen even on the dimmest screen brightness level (that something sparking in my brain and not in a good way sensation was all i felt) i had to shutdown.
I went on the Baby Center App on my phone with the screen brightness at the dimmest and was able to learn a couple of useful things on stages of labor, how to know i was progressing, what to look out for, how to time my contractions, etc. I used different coping techniques to manage the pain- from practising breathing and praying to mentally psyching myself with positive words 'It is well with me','i can do this', 'my body was made for this', 'God that has brought me this far, will see me true to a beautiful end', 'this is not pain, its discomfort', 'It'll soon pass', etc. I also twerked and vibrated my bum with my arms stretched out &grabbing at thin air (i know it sounds absurd and i stumbled on it by accident while writhing in pain, i must have looked ludicrous), also kneeling or laying in a particular position and putting pressure/massaging my back helped (I may do a detailed post on coping techniques for labor pain). The crazy thing i didn't know about labour was that the pain builds up-it starts at 10 then climbs to like 5000, stays there for a bit, subsides and then comes back again-if that makes any sense. I have a high pain tolerance and i'm really not a shouter (i also wanted to conserve as much energy as possible for 'pushing') so i was quiet throughout my labor and instead ground my teeth or bit my lip or cheek.
I kept going to pee and check myself  (i had read it helps labor progress faster) and managed to take naps in between contractions until i saw my mucus plug then my water broke not long after-it was not a big sploosh as i had anticipated (i had even spread a nightingale waterproof pad on the bed in preparation), it was a trickling as though i couldn't hold my pee. I had my 'bloody show' after my water broke, i quickly cleaned up, wore a pad and changed. I woke hubby and my sis up, told them to get the hospital bags and we went to the hospital. It was the longest ride of my life even though we got to the hospital in less than 10 mins. Baby Kiara was so ready to enter the world, the pressure i felt was so extremely intense that i really thought i'd have her in the car.
I told hubby where to park when we got to the hospital and waddled as fast as i could to the Labour & Delivery ward (we had been told what to do in our prenatal class) with my sis, i told them how i was feeling, my water had broken and i had seen my mucus plug. They asked if it was my first baby and i said yes, they said i should sit down 'cos the doctor was attending to someone else. Y'all should have seen my face contort. lol. i literally said 'I want to Poo really bad!' that was when they took me seriously, begging me not to poo o, that the pressure i was feeling was the baby (like sey i no know πŸ˜«πŸ˜’). They informed the Doctor, hurriedly set up the Delivery Area and gave me a hospital gown to change into, i did not even care if there was any man there, i changed so fast and laid down on the bed. My people my legs had never been spread as wide as it was that day, the doctor said i was crowning, told me to grab my ankles and push (i had read on how to push so i did) i could feel the pain from baby's head pushing down, he said sustain the push and PLOP! Baby Kiara was out-Saturday December 23, 2017 5:20am at 39Weeks. 
My Birthday. I could not believe it! Relief was all i felt and 0 pain.πŸ˜‚
My 1st thoughts were 'That's It?!, She's here?! Just like that?!'😲😲. I had expected to be crushing hubby's hand while pushing, pull his beard, cry and all the other things i had been told women in labor do. Alas i was destined to have an easy, 2min noodle fast delivery. lol. I doubt it took 5mins from when i laid down on the hospital bed till she was born. Hubby and my sis even missed her birth 'cos had gone to the car to get our hospital bags. We all had not expected her to come out that fast, both of them were supposed to be with me to see her delivered but came in to meet her on my chest.
Baby Kiara came out with eyes wide open and hungry, they put her on my chest and cut the umbilical cord. I birth the placenta not long after, it was tied into a nylon bag we gave them and handed over to us for disposal. Kiara was taken to a baby bed in the corner where they cleaned her, checked her vitals,weighed her and did the necessary tests and measurements before bringing her to me wrapped up to be breastfed. The nurse cleaned up my thighs and legs with Comfit pads and disinfectant, then the Doctor informed me i was still bleeding a bit more than i should and he'd have to clean me out to know the cause and know if i'd need stitches, he shoved Comfit pads up my vagina to clean out the blood clots (This was painful!😭)then put a pill up my butt and said he'd observe me and the for an hour. The nurse finished cleaning me and the delivery area up, wore me my disposable pant with a Comfit pad, laid a clean nightingale pad on the bed and covered me. I breastfed baby, jisted with my hubby and sis and they took turns carrying her.I filled a form the nurse brought for baby and she was issued an hospital card.
The paediatrician came to see baby not long after and told us she would have to be taken to the NICU to monitor her vitals and keep her under observation due to her birth weight. She weight 2kg which was below the minimum normal baby weight. Hubby followed the paediatrician with baby's hospital bag to oversee things. Once she was settled in, he and my sis had to go buy baby food and other things on the hospital list we had not gotten.

The Doctor came back to check on me, he told me to go ease myself, i went to pee and used a bowl of water to dilute the pee from stinging (i had read about this while preggers). He checked me and said i was still losing more blood than i should.
Y'all, this is where i felt PAIN!!! forget Labor and pushing out a baby, that was a piece of cake.
He had to shove his hand with a Comfit pad up my vagina to clean out blood clots and properly see the tears he had to suture, meanwhile my legs were in stirrups. I breathed n exclaimed FUCK a couple of times, they encouraged me n told me i had been and was still doing very well and it'd soon be over, I kept nodding, thanked them, i was sweating and asked that the AC be turned on which they did. I was very surprised i didn't cry, in my head i was just thinking how can this short doctor have such a long hand, he's practically elbow deep in me!! Is he trying to go to my throat ni?! How can this be more painful than the labor and delivery combined??!! This is the definition of Violation!πŸ˜²πŸ˜±πŸ˜¬πŸ˜“πŸ˜­πŸ˜·
He injected me in 3 different areas down there to numb me,  I closed my eyes and practiced my breathing techniques throughout the suturing process. It was a tad painful when the stitch caught my lil hairs (imagine if i had not shaved!*smh*). It honestly seemed to take forever and i could feel my legs going numb in the stirrups, apparently i had many tiny internal tears and the doctor was meticulous in getting it all stitched up. He massaged my tummy afterwards to be sure there were no more clots or excess bleeding (also painful). My tummy looked lopsided afterwards. lol.
The Doctor advised i do a regular sitz bath twice a day to prevent infection and emphasized i use lukewarm water. with lots of salt I thanked him and the nurse(who was pregnant by the way) and told them well done.
The nurse cleaned me up and helped me change into clean pads n disposable undies, i sat on a nightingale pad in a chair (surprisingly i sat comfortably and did not feel any pain) and waited to be transferred to my ward. I thanked the nurse again, told her job well done and asked how her baby was kicking.
Hubby went to see Baby in NICU (Neonatal Intensive Care Unit) then stayed in the waiting room till i was moved to my ward. I was on my phone afterwards replying birthday chats/msgs.The nurses congratulated me and were really nice. I browsed Browsed, Chilled & ate. They checked my vitals much later and the doctor came to see me. The Nurses did their rounds and gave me my medication. I went to the NICU to breastfeed baby every 3 hours (they showed me how to get a good latch)and observe how she was being cared for. We kept the news of baby's birth to ourselves and enjoyed the peace and quiet.😁😊
I was discharged the next day but opted to stay in the hospital till baby was discharged on the 25th and we took her home. We shared the news of her birth  with family and friends after we had settled in at home.
TMI-I had my 1st poop postpartum easily (i had been dreading this after getting stitched  due to stuff i had read online) good thing i'd been eating veggies and the likes i guess.  Comfit pad is supersoft and disposable undies are bae!
Baby Kiara's birth was the most surreal and beautiful experience i have ever had. I did not feel an instant attachment to her, moreso with her being whisked away to the NICU but the bond grew over time as i carried her, breastfed her, cared for her, watched her and more. The love i feel for her as my daughter is indescribable. It's been 11 months of being a mom and i wouldn't trade it for anything.
I have the best Birthday Mate now although i was reluctant to share my day initially (if you are a late December baby or you've read some of my old birthday posts, you understand why) i don't mind anymore and think its actually kind of special.πŸ’–πŸ‘ΆπŸ˜
I presume if you are reading this you are probably pregnant, i pray God grants you a smooth delivery with baby and mother in the best health. 😘
Check out my other pregnancy & baby related posts.
Toodles!XooX

Wednesday, 28 March 2018

My Pregnancy Story & Diaries Weeks 1-5

I finally found some time to come on here with a post while adjusting to this new mommyhood life, do bear with me for now 'cos i can't stick to my 'regular' schedule.
Although i wasn't able to blog about my pregnancy, i documented my pregnancy journey using the Google Keep app on my phone. I decided to write this post as an introduction to my Pregnancy Diaries and as a follow-up to my Baby Pressure post so here goes.
Quick Recap-Hubby & I got married in May 2014 and agreed to wait at least 2 years before trying for a baby. We decided to wait an extra year 'cos Year 2016 get as e be back then and the dreaded biological clock was still on my side. It was by God's grace we were able to stand our ground and not succumb to all the Baby Pressure. Its our life afterall and looking back now, boy am i glad we didn't rush things.
PREGNANCY STORY
April 2017 came and we decided we were kinda ready to start trying for a baby, before that we had started preconception care at the beginning of the year. Hubby & I did the necessary medical tests again (we had done them before we got married) and reconfirmed we were both medically fit to have a baby. We both started taking folic acid & tried to stick to a healthy lifestyle (diet, drinking more water, eating more fruits & veggies, etc.). I started exercising & was able to lose the 'small chops & enjoyment' weight i had piled on by December 2016 and went back to my regular Size 8 from Size 10. 
We started trying for a baby in April, i have a regular menstrual cycle so i just calculated my ovulation period &we basically just went with the flow and made sure we had sex before and after my ovulation. I honestly did not expect i'd get preggers on our 1st try, trust me if i did we'd have probably started trying in May 'cos i soooo didn't want a December baby talkless of a birthday mate. Alas we all know God's ways are not our ways.
People had made us feel that because we chose to wait, we would find it  difficult to get pregnant at all, not to talk of on the 1st try. That's part of the reasons i"m writing this post & the Pregnancy Diaries, to encourage any couple that have decided to wait a while before having a kid that it doesn't mean they can't get  pregnant easily when they are ready and they can definitely have an easy pregnancy & delivery.
HOW I FOUND OUT I WAS PREGNANT & DIARIES WEEK 1 to 5)
I'm quite in tune with my body so when i started feeling funny and extremely fatigued, i had a strong feeling it was pregnancy but i did not want to jinx it. I stopped my workouts due to the fatigue and watched my diet. Hubby and i discussed and agreed to take a pregnancy test if i missed my period, which i did. I bought 2 of the #100 strip pregnancy tests from the pharmacy (nothing fancy), did them and they were both positiveπŸ’– We decided to keep the news to ourselves (it wasn't easy by the way) till i was past the 3 month mark (the risk of miscarriage and other issues is way less at this point).
Life was still pretty routine, nothing much had changed and sometimes i'd forget i'm preggers and wonder why i feel so tired. lol.
  • SYMPTOMS-Abdominal Bloating, Extreme fatigue, Frequent peeing and Swollen Tender Breasts
  • FEELINGS-Hubby & I were excited n happy to have gotten preggers on our 1st try. I missed being more active n working out, getting good sleep n waking up feeling rested. The whole thing felt surreal.
  • WORRIES-Eating the wrong thing or not eating food with essential nutrients/vitamins,Molar or Ectopic pregnancy,miscarriage,abnormalities or anything going wrong
  • ACTIONS-I Prayed about my worries, signed up on the BabyCenter App, joined Pregnancy, Baby & You BBM Group, read, researched and tried to eat healthy n nutritious food, drink a lot of water and take folic acid daily
Watch out for the rest of my Pregnancy Diaries Series.
Toodles!XooX