My views on this topic are highlighted in this TNC post, moreso under the comments section with the comments made by CHIDI & DEEHVAHRZZ quoted below.
DEEHVAHRZZ's Comment
"Is it wrong to comment on every post? I don’t think so
Even if you had asked your friend to go meet a sister, 95% would not have been able to help her. I wanted to join Automobile repair in camp during our Saed program ND d man rudely pointed me towards catering and make up. That was where he felt I would be useful.
A colleague’s car had a fault. After asking what was wrong ND he didn’t know, I figured out his battery was dead ND fixed it for him. He said he was ashamed I could fix it. Dragged me to the mechanic because he trusted a man more than he did me. I was right and he paid for the man to tell him I had fixed it. Men r believed to have d sole know how of cars.
I think you said so because of the gender role we have been customed to use. If it was about a baby, am sure you would have said “sister”.
I don’t think u were being a sexist or it makes you less of a feminist. It’s what has been ingrained in us.
It however doesn’t mean women can’t learn the no how of a car almost as any man. Just as they have invaded our hairdressing and tailoring industry. I think most of the gender roles and separation we have had is just a mental one. Those barriers can be broken to a large extent..
You are not less a feminist for that. Afterall you realized immediately it doesn’t necessarily have to be a man. Am sure they know women can do almost everything they can if not better. Their Egos however won’t allow them admit it. As long as you want equality, you are a feminist in every right. All I have ever wanted is for the world to stop the double standard."
CHIDI's Comment
"You’re not a terrible feminist. I probably would have said the same thing. However, it is important to know WHY we would do that.
Men are not more inherently knowledgeable about cars or fixing stuff in general. They are the ones that have been taught these skills.
Most men I know, started driving before 17. Either they were asked to, or stole the cars. Girls were not expected to be driving at that age.
Point it, it’s safe to assume that there’s a wide gap between men and women in our generation concerning certain skills (cars, cooking, washing plates, fixing the sink)
What makes us good feminists is attempting to the bridge the gap for the next generation (and for yourself if you’re so inclined).
Have a good day."
MY VIEW
I often wonder whether i'm feminist enough and the TNC post brought some clarity to my thoughts. I plan to train my kids regardless of their gender in all the skills i can without prejudice regardless of if its considered more masculine or feminine. If the boys are learning to cook/tailoring/hairdressing, the girls will also learn too and if the girls are learning about automobiles and driving/carpentry/barbing, the boys will learn too. Get my drift. When they choose their career path, advising them will definitely not be from the standpoint that its too girly or boyish.
I believe most parents (especially Nigerians) stick to teaching the skills considered masculine to the boys and those considered feminine to the girls strictly out of fear that it will affect their sexual orientation (i.e make them become gay or lesbians) and ability to atract a suitable (ie. somesone sitable to the Parents) spouse. I totally disagree with this as many people have proved this thought pattern wrong in recent times- Heterosexual Men are make-up artists, hairdressers, chefs while Heterosexual Women are carpenters, automobile experts, barbers and this has led to the roles being wayyyyy less gender specific making it easier for anyone to take on them. Same thing with Careers.
Play your role in not discriminating any gender(being sexist) and we are well on the right path. We are all equal.
Toodles!XooX
