Two of my girlfriends felt the need to
give me a chic lesson. They say I have the potential to be more of a chic but I
am not seizing the opportunity. Their case against me is as follows:
- I do not wear makeup enough
- I
wear flats too often to work even though i have heels and fancier shoes
- I
do not fix my nails or wear nail polish
- I
don’t wear nicer clothes to work as much as I have them
- My
jewelry is not nice/solid enough
- My
bag is not expensive enough, I don’t change it often enough and the ones I have
are not nice enough
- I
spend too much money on my skin
- I
don’t ‘invest’ it weaves
- I
wear only one wristwatch
- I
do not fix my hair enough
- I
tie scarves too often
I believe this "intervention" probably unknown to the culprits is a form of peer pressure, a certain look has
become an ideal and because one of them felt I had the potential to live up to
that ideal and the other does her best to be that ideal, they tried to pressure
me into seeing the ideal from their point of view and become subject to it.
Well my answer is No!
I am my own person and I have
been for several years of my life, I have had to mature quickly due to some
responsibilities assigned to me early on in life. I have never been one to
follow trends or what is in vogue, I have my own style and way of doing things
and happen to be quite content and able to make use of what is available to me.
I can be a tomboy, hot chic, casual chic, just casual, rugged. It depends on my
state of mind and at the end of the day I think it’s up to me to choose how I
want to express myself. Of course suggestions can be made about outfits, style
and the likes by friends, but when they feel the need to state it as the above,
I see no point in regarding it.
My response to the ‘accusations’
leveled to me are as follows:
|
moi without makeup and wearing a scarf |
|
my famous black flats and one of my bags |
- I
do not need to wear makeup if I do not want too. I think skin care is the most
important, if your skin is well taken care of u’ll need less make up and I can
choose to make up when necessary to look older/more mature or just glam and choose not to
makeup when i don't feel like without people getting used to my made up face and assuming that’s my
real face(we fit change face now with makeup techniques n products). I hate being asked if I’m ill just ‘cos I choose to go without
makeup. Luckily no 1 has asked me that in years ‘cos I’m not always made up and my skin can breathe. A smile is all u need to be fully madeup.
- I
love shoes! Anyone who really knows me knows that. That said I’m more of a
comfort person whenever I can afford to be. If there is an important meeting or
I’m in the mood to be extra chic, I totally rock my heels, otherwise my black
flats work just fine for me and are corporate enough, sorry if they are now a bore
to your eyes or don’t live up to your high heels but I do not feel the need to
always add a few more inches to my height, I choose comfort over fashion as
regards work. If it’s an outing and suited to any of my fancy shoes u can be
sure I’ll rock them.
|
my heels rack with a couple of shoes missing though |
|
my lovely white nails |
I
have beautiful nails, I am aware and people tell me all the time, they are
white, healthy and I grow them a bit long and keep them trimmed. I see no
reason to fix. I actually like wearing nail polish, but detest when it gets
chipped or cracked and i have to take it off, so I don’t bother at all, except I
have a wedding or I just feel like it. I don’t see why I should make it a
regular thing though.
|
nappy hair, very mild makeup and one of nonchalant office wears |
Again,
my dressing depends on me and from whose perspective it is I’m not wearing nice
enough clothes (my friends can say this ‘cos they have had access to the other kinda
clothes I have in my wardrobe). I admit I can be a bit nonchalant about my
dressing at times and my excuse for that usually is me being too lazy to iron
(I really hate ironing!!) but it’s hardly ever unofficial, just not so ‘chic’ at
most. But then again I know how to dazzle (dress to impress) when there is the need ‘a meeting’ or
‘event’ or even just 'cos i'm in the mood to be fly, so I think I'll survive. I dress the way i wanna be addressed.
- I’m
not really a jewelry person, I’m more routinely when it comes to that, I pick a
set that works with most of my outfits and stick to it except I’m out to be
fiery or jazz up an outfit with my jewelry. I do not subscribe to the theory
that your jewelry has to be always be big or heavy or loud or blingy or whatever else
they say it has to be to look nice on you. If I like it and it goes with my
outfit I will wear it.
- I’m
not a fan of bags, never have been. Left to me I’d carry a purse/wallet and be on my merry way. A bag is more of a necessity to me than an accessory. The
different colors I have is just because of how much I love colors, left to me
I’d rock a big black bag that can contain all my stuff all year round. One of
my 'intervention' friends is a big fan of bags ‘correct bags’ i.e the Michael
Kors, Prada and co. and will spend all her money on one whenever possible. My priorities are
different, I have about 5 different colored bags that are functional and i doubt
I’ll be adding to the collection anytime soon except I get one as a gift or I find one so
irresistible that I have to have it. I interchange the bags from time to time
and they function just fine for me. I doubt I will be getting any ‘correct’ bags as
I cannot justify to myself spending so much on a particular item.
|
straightened natural hair,made up,heels,gown-close to 'the ideal' |
|
short weave,painted nails |
- I
can justify spending money on my skin! Totally!! This is the one thing that I’m
guaranteed will stay with me through my years on earth so why won’t I spoil it.
I try to eat healthy, go for hammams, massages, spa treats and the likes ‘cos
when I look good (my skin), I feel good. Its not only a physical thing but also
mental. I can do self treats at home but I don’t consider my spa visits a waste
either, as I can totally relax and be spoilt by someone else instead of doing
the work myself. Oh and my fiancé also loves my skin as well!lol
|
very mild makeup and my natural hair stretched out |
- Weaves!
Lol!! Brazillian, Peruvian, Indian, Bohemian, Nigerian?? lol etc. *rme with their super high price
tags, again I do not see the point. I hardly do anything in life that I do not
see a reason for or that I cannot justify to myself. I own none of the above
named or the others that fall into their category and it’s not because I’m
#TeamNatural! (not just with my hair but living as a whole), I have grown out
my natural hair for about 4years now and I am still loving it. That aside though, there are times I braid and wear weaves, I go for the normal priced weaves
whenever I want to do weaves, i look at the quality, if it suits the hairstyle
I want to make, my stylist’s opinion and the price tag. Once all that is put into
consideration, I’m good to go. I am very versatile with my hairstyles from
super short styles to long styles, curly styles, etc. and once I’m done with
the weaves I thrash them if I see they are no longer nice to serve any future
purpose. Most of my friend’s that ‘invest’ in these weaves say they buy it ‘cos you can wash it,
use heat on it, curl it up, It doesn't shed, looks chic, lasts longer, etc. but
what I have noticed is them having just one is never enough!! They always want
more even if they are doing the same hairstyle with it. If you can afford such
extravagance then by all means buy away, otherwise i consider it a waste. I
have a friend that spent about N150,000 to buy such a weave and ended up broke
and still gave out the weave eventually!! O.o nitoripe why?! I told my friends
even If I was a millionaire, I would still rather use the money to go on a trip
rocking some long loose braids in Ghana, The Gambia or somewhere else I can
have a nice time and make some good memories! They could not believe
I was saying that *shrug* that’s how I see it though.
|
my famous black watch and painted natural nails |
- I
did not even see the need for this point. I just dey laff as dem talk this one.
No be time dem dey use watch for? Well I know people use their wristwatches
as a status symbol thanks to the price tag such as the ‘Rolex’, ‘Hublot’ and
co. I have a couple of wristwatches but
I can’t be bothered to match them to my outfit all the time or get the overly expensive
ones. I wear my slim black one unless I’m in the mood for a change (which is
rare) or the battery stops. Its function to me is to tell time and occupy my
wrist. Shikena.
- I
do not fix my hair enough. *giggles. That’s part of why I have healthy natural
hair, I allow my own hair and scalp to breathe and its beautiful enough for me
to rock without weaves. I can braid, rock my hair or do weaves. My choice and they all look good on me.
|
me made up wearing a scarf and 'jewelry' |
- This
one is not even a point. I tie scarves because I love scarves and also when I’m
having a bad hair day. I have always loved the look on northerners and muslims,
it just has this elegance to it. I don’t see why I can’t rock scarves just ‘cos
I’m not a northerner or muslim. I shall drape my scarf, turban it or wear it
however I please because I like them and the look they give. Oh and my fiancé
likes it too :D *bonus
|
Geeky look, very mild makeup, glasses and nappy hair |
|
Nappy hair,colorful outfit,one of my bags, made up-weekend outing |
Having responded to all the
accusations leveled against me, I hope I have been able to convince and not to
confuse you with my point. Lol!! (ignore me). This 'intervention' was held at that broke period in the month when salaries have been exhausted and it was lunch time. I'm hungry and broke i heard one of my 'intervention' friends lament, i asked her what she wanted and sent someone to get us something to eat. I left their office with a smile on my face, i believe i had established my point.
|
dolled up with makeup,not brazillian weave, jewelry and hot outfit all done by me :D - 'the ideal' |
|
bohemian curls,painted nails,made up and jeweled up-wedding tinz |
|
Friday outfit-made up, wearing abaya and wearing a scarf |
|
made up and scarf draped |
At the end of the day, I think it
all boils down to contentment and self-esteem. If you can afford all the above
and want to use them then by all means,enjoy; but do not let material things define you. As for me I have learnt to live with a little
as well as a lot and I am happy and contented with the little and many I have. If you
have followed my blog well, you’ll know I have lil/no issues with self-esteem. I
learnt to love myself from an early age and that I don’t need accessories to
increase/determine my worth. I want whoever meets me to like me for me and not a
screensaver version of myself; when i shed all the material things, is there any substance left to my actual person? I have been blessed with someone that knows me and
takes me as I am. As for the above it’s all about perspective. Eventually
everything in life is vanity. Good to choose ur team well. I have chosen my
team. Healthy living, running my own life race, touring the world, enjoying the
simple things of life and doing what makes me happy. If you do any of the
above, i'm not trying to crucify,keep it up but do it for you and not to please anyone or live
up to expectations otherwise these things will consume you. Do what makes you happy (but not to ur detriment or that of others if possible) and allow others do the same. Enjoy my pics for you to draw ur own conclusion. I found these posts on BellaNaija and Diary by Emmy that kinda relates to what i'm saying, you should read the comments on the posts also
http://www.bellanaija.com/2013/06/11/ten-ways-to-be-a-true-lagos-fashionista-not/ http://diarybyemmy.com/all-a-girl-ever-needs-to-be-sexy/
http://urbanbushbabes.com/2012/11/30-things-i-learned-on-my-way-to-age-30/
Toodles!XooX
Lol...Jez discovered ur blog and bin reading all...I love the natural u jere..Besides,u never mentioned the cream or anything u apply to ur skin aside frm spa treatments.Dnt mind me,in love with d skin...
ReplyDeleteTnk u kindly @Esther 😊 na Shea Butter a.k.a Ori i dey use o n sometimes Olive/Coconut/Moringa oil if its unavailable.
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ReplyDeletei have starting using black soap as my bathing soap and shampoo for my transitioner hair since july and i do have ori but it does not show forth on my skin'. i used most traditional products due to her benefits on skin and face.a great blog dear
ReplyDelete@Ajayi Grace thank you kindly. You can try natural oils (sesame oil, coconut oil, sweet almond oil, olive oil, etc.). Traditional products are definitely beneficial to the skin especially as they don't contain harsh chemicals.
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